I'll take the Vera Wang please...

I just wrote a whole blog and deleted it.... but the title remains, so i'll let you mentally speculate to it's topic :)

On a similar vein though, I'm moving to sheffield in 6 days... it's pretty exciting but starting to dawn on me now too what is about to happen! People keep talking about saying goodbye and things and it all seems a bit weird, i think in my head i'm equating it to when i've moved away before, but in the past i always knew i was going temporarily... i knew Liverpool was still home and that i was just having a room somewhere else for a few months. But it's starting to kick in that this is potentially the start of a whole new life, or at least a big chapter.

I said goodbye to Heidi this morning (my best friend's 3 year old daughter and the light of my life..i don't think i could love that kid more than i do!) and getting a big hug off her and promising to at least see her at Christmas was pretty sad. And it's more sad knowing that her little sister, Violet, isn't going to grow up knowing me like Heids does. Heidi's been my little girl ever since she was 6 months old and i used to dance around the kitchen to get her to sleep when she cried on everyone else, it's going to be sad missing out on that with Vi-Li, but i guess we'll get used to it! But we've hatched plans to visit lots and send pictures and Heid's said she'll make sure she talks to me on the phone too (that'll be funny at least... "Excuse me Auntie beth..." means she wants something :-) ) and so I hope they'll at least grow up knowing who I am, even if it is just as someone who visits and plays with them every few months.

The crazy thing with moving is I have no clue how my life is going to pan out in a few years time, or even really in 6 months time! It's scary and incredible to know that this time next year, my life could be completely different, in a way that i could never predict.

I love living this Jesus-life... of living on the edge but trusting that God's got plans for me. I just pray and hope that i can live further on the edge in the future... how can i do more so serve people? How can i really make a difference? I never want to get to the stage where I think i've done enough... that i've done my bit by being in GoldDigger. But i want to constantly be challenged to do more, to bring Good News to the poor in whatever way that inhabits itself, to truely learn what it is to love people unconditionally, to live a life fully infused by Jesus.... now that is exciting.

I'm constantly amazed at how God uses such a confused, jumbled up person as me... but then that's kind of the point I guess. And so i'm looking forward to the new challenges, to new houses and new friends and new offices and new everything, but the same God- knowing that he is my constant, yesterday, today or tomorrow, Liverpool or Sheffield, single or attached, poor or rich, valley or mountain top... and that truly is an amazing thing.