"look at me, I'm a princess..."

Today i went round to my friend's, Katie and Dave's, for tea and "a play" with their very funny, and very energetic kids, Jacob (who's 5 and is actually a child genius) and Erin (who's 3 going on 35, and is the biggest flirt in the world). I had a great time chatting to Katie, who is just one of those people i wish i was more like, and ticking the kids, inbetween reading Jacob a book about trains (he's obsessed), making krispy cakes with cherrios instead, playing our new falling over game and generally having the kind of fun you can only have when surrounded by the very small.

After tea, Erin decided to show me her dancing, which involved her twirling around the room in her "pretty dress" (her favorite activity of the moment is getting changed into different "pretty" clothes) waving her hands in the air and giggling to MaryMary classics and "never smile at a croccodile". Normally i have to join in, but today as i watched her and told her she was very good, she stopped, grinned at me and declared,

"look at me Beth, I'm a princess!"

I grinned back and told her that yes, she was a princess, and prayed that she'd never forget it.
As she carried on dancing, i thought about how self assured this gorgeous litle blonde girl was, about how she never doubted herself, that she giggled with joy and not self conciousness, that she saw no problem whatsoever in flashing her knickers to the world and enjoying every day as it comes. She never worries that she's unloved and in return, loves everyone back, not worrying about guarding herself incase she gets hurt. Erin turned to katie earlier, whe she told her that i was coming for tea and said, "yay, i love beth. beth loves me doesnt she mummy!?" in a way that showed that she didn't doubt me for a second, just wanted to show off how much she was loved. To Erin, nothing is impossible.

God's been quitely speaking to me recently about being child-like, and although i'm not looking at flashing my knickers regularly, i want to learn to be more like Erin. To live in the knowledge of knowing that i am the daughter of THE king, to believe that i am a princess, even when i'm in my scruffy jeans and hoodie. That no matter how scuffed and battered i get, he will always love me and so what have i got to lose?

Isn't it great when you get really excited about something???!

One of the big ways that God pointed me back towards Gurl was that it really excites me (even when i'm bored and can't be bothered!) It's so easy to get bogged down in the marshyness of it all being too scary, but God just reminds me sometimes to get off my bum and do stuff. I've been so lazy recently, not being motivated to do anything, but i'm realising that i've got to be disciplined with it- even when i don't feel like getting out of bed.

Tomorrow i'm teaching small people to dance, high school musical stylee! it's going to be great! (i hope.. things don't get to be rubbish when you're getting paid!!!)

anyway i must sleep, blog properly soon xxx